Table of Contents
War of the Were-Mice by Julie Frost
Twisty by Siobhan Gallagher
Whinny If You Love Me: A Love Story by Andrew Kaye
Why, Ethan, Why?!?!? by Brynn MacNab
All Flesh is Grass by Kelda Crich
Preface by Bernie Mojzes
Welcome to the Journal of Unlikely Acceptances! Whats unlikely about it, you exclaim? The whole thing! Everyone knows theirs no such thing as bad fiction. All author’s know theres only bad readers who fail to recognize the genius of our work. You know who uses grammer and spellcheck? People with no imagination! You no who tells you to know the rules of storytelling before you break them? Them! The people who want to keep us out of they’re little secret clubhouse so they can get all the awards and all the publishing contracts and all the money, that’s what! Everyone knows editors don’t read the submissions anyway because they don’t want to publish you so why even bother to read there stupid guidelines. Just send whatever story, then you can write them about what jerks they are for not publishing it and rub it in their faces when it does get published and everyone loves it. Then they’ll be sorry. You’ll all be sory!
All of which is to say, we hope you enjoy this issue of deliberately terrible flash fiction. In the spirit of the issue, we fully welcome reviews where it’s clear you haven’t read the story, and you hate it because it isn’t a recipe for banana bread, which is what you were really in the mood to read.
Happy April Fool’s Day!